My name is Edna, and this is my story…
“FROM A MISGUIDED SEARCH FOR ACCEPTANCE TO THE TREASURE OF GOD’S ETERNAL LOVE”
I was born in Texas, the youngest of three girls until the age of 11, when my only brother was born. We were raised in the church, but there was something lacking in our home life. My father was unable to show affection or offer words of encouragement. My siblings and I hungered greatly for his love and affection, but for whatever reason, it was impossible for our father to say, “I love you.” The lack of my father’s love and affection caused me to struggle throughout my life with self-worth, and my fear of rejection tainted my perspective of God.
Being raised in church, I was baptized at the age of 6 out of fear of being forever separated from my parents, rather than from the understanding that I was a sinner in need of salvation. As a teenager and into young adulthood, God convicted me of my need for salvation. I tried to justify my relationship with God by claiming that I had already been saved, even though in my heart I knew this was not true. I finally made the decision to make my heart right with God and seek His forgiveness for my sins by accepting His offer of salvation through His Son Jesus Christ.
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
I deeply wanted to feel deserving of God’s love, so I became very legalistic in how I lived the Christian life. I was trying to make myself acceptable before God by my own works, but the Bible says that “all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags” (Isaiah 64:6).
unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)